Back to School Tips
Let’s all just admit that things get a little hazy or wonky when it comes to sleep in the summertime – so you’ll be getting no judgment from me on what might have gone down.
Even though I’m a sleep consultant and I know all the right things to do - I myself contend with late bedtimes, skipped naps, inconsistent schedules, unenforced rules, and many of the other “in-advisables” that I usually preach.
Summer is a precious time, though hot as heck it may get outside, so we all want to squeeze in as many memories as we can. And if the choice falls down on maintaining that consistent bedtime and staying up late to watch the fireworks – well, there’s really no question about it.
Point is, whatever happened over summer break - don’t worry about it because all can be forgiven. The mission now is to get your little one back on track so they can get back to sleep at a reasonable hour before they head back to school.
So I hope you’ll keep reading without fear of any finger wagging coming from me on what you should have done differently. It’d actually be quite hypocritical of me to be honest.
Here’s the game plan:
SET A BEDTIME AND STICK TO IT
The question that usually comes up here is “What time should my kids be going to bed?” Well, it really does depend on what time they need to be up by in the morning. Remember that kids and babies do need about 10-12 hours of total night sleep. So if your toddler needs to be up by 7 AM in order to get ready for school, they should be asleep by 830/9 at the latest. Factor in the time it takes them to get to sleep after they get into bed, plus maybe the inevitable requests that will come for a glass of water or to use the bathroom - and 7:30/8 pm is really going to be the latest they need to get into bed by to still get the sleep they need.
And you know what, an early bedtime never hurts the parents either - don’t we all want to exist child free for a few hours a day? You need to be able to eat some junk food without fear of being spotted, to do grown up things, and just to simply recharge those parenting batteries. So that early bedtime is just as important for you and your spouse as it is for your kids! Okay, so now that we know when to put them to sleep, let’s get onto the harder portion of this discussion and dissect the issue of HOW to get them to sleep.
DON’T LEAVE IT TO THE LAST MINUTE
Hopefully, you’re reading this while there’s still a few weeks before school resumes, because the easiest way to make these changes and get back on track with sleep is to do it little by little.
If your child has been going to bed around 9 PM for the better part of their vacation, try moving bedtime up by about 15 minutes every 4 days until they’re back to their normal bedtime (or whatever time you need bedtime to be at). If this requires a little deception on your part by adjusting the clocks around the house or in their room - go ahead and do it! Sometimes the ends have to justify the means ;)
ESTABLISH A BEDTIME ROUTINE
If you had an effective bedtime routine before summer vacation threw everything up in the air, try to re-implement as much as possible everything you used to do. On the other hand, if this is your first attempt at implementing a bedtime routine, let me just stress how much easier a repetitive, predictable bedtime routine can make your life. When your child’s body and brain start to associate things like bath, story, brushing teeth, putting on PJs, all in the same order at the same time each night — it will cue up their melatonin production and make sleep come way more easily.
USE A TIMER
Of course things like baths and books are super fun, so there can be a tendency for your little one to try and negotiate for more time or more books. If you find yourself in this predicament one too many times, a timer can be your best friend for keeping things on schedule. And as a bonus, as silly as this may sound, it will end up taking the blame off you for making these unwanted decisions. Mom can be reasoned with, but the timer is unwavering.
TURN OFF THE SCREENS
Along with weakening our enforcement of bedtime in the summer, we also tend to ease up on the rules surrounding TV, video games, or other screens in the evening hours before bedtime. There’s obviously no homework to be done so might as well allow an extra episode of a favorite show.
The thing about screens though, whether it’s a phone, TV, computer, or tablet, is that they put out a massive amount of blue light. Our brains associate blue light with sunshine, and therefore daytime, so screens before bed can actually have the unwanted effect of firing your kid’s system back up when it should be powering down. Try to avoid any screen time for at least 2 hours before bed. (Side note - this also applies to adults. If you’re having trouble sleeping at night, or falling asleep, try reading instead of watching TV before bed.)
TURN TO THE DARK SIDE
While we’re on the subject of light, we need to also talk about the fact that it doesn’t get dark until significantly later than 8 PM, and the only thing that simulates sunlight better than a TV screen is — well, you know, actual sunlight. If your child’s bedroom is still lit up when you’re putting them to bed, I suggest investing in a set of blackout blinds. It doesn't have to be fancy at all. You can get cheap options on Amazon very easily. Though if you’re concerned about aesthetics and willing to spend the money, you can find plenty of options online that will look nice and still block out the light. Whichever way you choose to do it, get that sunlight out of the bedroom. It’ll make a world of a difference!
One final thing to add here: Having experienced leniency regarding bedtime can suddenly transform your child into an incredible lawyer. Arguments for why they should be allowed to stay up later are likely to be heard for at least a few days, and potentially the rest of their childhood. Luckily, parenting is not a democracy. It’s a glorious dictatorship where MOM makes all the rules.
Don’t give in to the pressure, because this early bedtime will likely be in place for a few years. The sooner they accept that as the norm, and their summertime hours as a special treat, the easier bedtime will be for you and for them.
So that’s it folks! As always, if you need more targeted help, reach out to me :)